Home can be a heaven on earth

Have you ever had those moments?  Those glimpses of what heaven will be like?  I lay in bed this morning and heard my house come to life as all the kids woke up.  As I read my scriptures I listened as my oldest let my youngest help him make eggs.  Instructing her ever so sweetly.  I listened as my two other sons talked to each other.  No fighting.  No yelling.  They just talked as they all made breakfast together.  It is moments like these I hate to walk in on.  So I just got to lay in bed and listen.  Today is going to be a good day.

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Halloween happens before Halloween

Am I the only one who feels this way?  Our kids had trunk or treating, costume parades and Halloween parties all before Halloween night.  It was cold and wet at our house on the 31st so I asked the kids if we could skip trick or treating down town.  They took pity on me.  We watched Hotel Transylvania and had homemade pizza instead.  Here are some fun pictures of Halloween before Halloween.

Charlie after his pre school pumpkin patch field trip

Lucy, the cupcake and me, the color pink at our church Halloween party.

Frank: Captain Rex

Oliver: Mad Scientist

Charlie: Super Why

Our friend Hailey: gangster

Pumpkin carving time!!!!!!

Dinosaur, pirate, gypsy and crystal ball.

These are just the pictures I got of all that we did!

Here is hoping Thanksgiving only happens once ;)

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Fluffy, dairy free waffles!!!

My weakness is a good, hefty breakfast.  I would eat a full brunch buffet every morning if I could.  Since the effort is too great and my waistline wouldn't fair well I settle on treating myself every once in a while.  Pancake and waffle mixes have never been up to my high standard and I like making things that I know all the ingredients involved.  Since my sweet baby has dictated that dairy is a big no no creating a light delicious waffle was getting harder... until now.

Light, fluffy, dairy free waffles

2 c coconut milk 

2T lemon juice

2 eggs or the equivalent of chia seeds and water

2 c flour (white or wheat.  I usually do half and half)

1 tsp baking soda

2 tsp baking powder

1 tsp sugar or agave nectar

1/2 tsp salt

6 T coconut oil

Heat you waffle iron and get ready to rock your taste buds!

Put the 2T lemon juice in a measuring cup that holds more than 2 cups liquid.  Add coconut milk to the measuring cup until it meets the 2 cup line. Let it sit for 5 minutes.  Measure out 6T coconut oil keep it in solid form and set aside.  In a large mixing bowl combine all dry ingredients.  Add 2 eggs to your coconut milk mixture and beat.  Pour wet ingredients into large mixing bowl with dry ingredients.  Add coconut oil and beat until all ingredients are well mixed.  The batter will be thin but don't sweat it.  Pour onto waffle iron (about a 1/3 cup per Belgian waffle).  This makes about eight waffles.  I usually top these babies with some homemade mixed berry topping.  Enjoy!

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Our first trip back to San Diego

'twas the day after Christmas about 8 in the morn.  I hauled all the kids out to the car with a yawn.  The car was all pack by yours truly, you see and to stay one more second was not ok with me.  

I struggled through Christmas Eve and Day all alone.  It was high time that our Daddy was home.  Not home, but with us, as we traveled down south.  In search of family, direct sunlight, and Mexican food that makes happy your mouth.

We picked up said daddy from work on our way.  All of the boys shouted hip, hip, hooray.  "Mommy is grumpy.  I'm tired of driving.  Are we there?," were all common phrases that tripped through the air.  

We drove and we stopped and we drove, drove some more.  "Geez, this is taking too long and I'm bored!"

We drove and we drove.  From morning till night.  After 14 LONG HOURS we saw Grammie's house lights.

Unload and sleep was the first thing to do and all of the rest came in a slew.

We first went to Sea World it was crowded, but fun.  The kids got to play and the shows?  We watched one.  

It was good when I got to visit my Pure Fitness Pool crew.  Everyone thought that Lucy was really cute too.

We visited Jesse's family, a first meeting for Lu.  She handled it well.  She smiled and cooed.  The boys climbed a hill and opened some presents.  Christmas extended!  I heard no objections :)

Sunday was special.  We blessed our sweet girl.  She looked so beautiful in her dress.  Flower with pearl.  My treasure: my family.  I know I can't do without.  It is now complete.  I have no breath of doubt.

Dropped Dad at the airport.  Work calls him back home.  Thank goodness the rest of us have more time to roam.  

Sister time!  I wish we could make it last longer.  All our goofy ways make our bond that much stronger!

We spent time with more friends and hiked a mountain (well, the boys anyway).  We relaxed and we played and they wanted to swim one fine day...

It lasted two seconds!  My kids yelped as the cold seeped into their hide!!  So they settled for playing outside the water, with a hose and water slide.  

All to quickly for me, our time came to an end.  We had to pack up the car and say farewell all over again.  Thank you everyone for making our trip so great!  We will be coming back soon.  I really can't wait.

Our vacation in verse.  I really can't believe I did that... on my phone even.  Writing about our travels back is a post in itself!

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It's about time to introduce this little girl

Lucy Louise Wattson was born at 12:30pm on october 5, 2013.  I know this post is long in coming!  I don't think I will be sharing my birth story quite yet.  It was pretty intense!  What I can say is we are happy she is here.  She is cute as can be and yes she also has a sensitive stomach.  BOOO!  Did I really think this one might be different?  We are learning what works for her and what foods are taboo for me.  Until I am ready to post my "bringing Lucy into the world" story here are a few pictures and a little of what is going on.

Getting some fresh air

Sporting the sparkly kicks

Hangin with mama

Family day at Natural Bridges Beach

She's got those baby blues

All my boys.  They are getting so big.  I have the grocery bill to prove it.  I wish I had the energy to type more but things are getting better so we will be blogging more soon.

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While we are waiting

(I started this before Lucy Lou was born)

So, it is a day after my due date and I am ready to be done.  While we are waiting for angel girl how about a post about the happenings around these here parts.  I really am loving it here.  Mountain living is growing on me.  I found a pool!!  There is a YMCA less than 10 minutes from my house with a masters swim program.  I am no longer without water!  Thanks to awesome neighbors I have been able to go a couple of times to get the weight off my body and enjoy some me time.  The boys love their school and their teachers.  Being the crazy mom I am, I volunteered to arrange yearbook pages for each of their classes.  I want to be involved where I can.  

I am so grateful for our home, even with its problems.  We moved in and I noticed it smelled like pot.  Apparently, the last tenants were growers.  Ugh!  Our landlord did his best to get rid of the smell but it was still pretty strong. After a few air fresheners, disinfectant, odor neutralizers, and some paint things are getting better.  Our next problem was a broken heater!  Thanks to my awesome brother in law we got the correct part for a great price and got it installed.  My boys are grateful to not have to sleep with three blankets or a 0 degree sleeping bag anymore.  

Unpacking has been a process... An ongoing process.  On Thursday I got some pictures up and hung some curtains on the living room.  Jesse comes home and says, "Who did all this?"

 I was so annoyed I almost smacked him.  "Who do you think," I retorted.  

"This is a lot.  I just didn't expect you to do this."

"We'll, somebody has got to do it!!" (Please excuse the nesting crazy pregnant lady.)

So now our house is somewhat put together, all laundry is done, linens are changed, shopping is finished, and some dinners are pre-made in the freezer.  We are ready for you Lucy.

The Y pool

Watching Handy Manny with tools

Singing to Lucy... who isn't out of my belly yet.

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Keeping my head above water

So, the car ride up was brutal.  We started off at 10 am and unfortunately did not get there until 9:00pm.  Since my night's rest wasn't the greatest I tried to rest while my mom did most of the driving.  I would just get to sleep and hear Charlie from the back seat "Mom, Mom, Mom, Mommy.." 

"What?!" I would respond and be retorted to with toddlerese.  The gist of the translation: don't go to sleep mom.  No problem kid.

The last leg of our journey was up "the hill".  That is what the locals call it.  We are only 500 ft above sea level.  As we start winding our way up every town gets a little smaller.  We go through a town with one stop light.  The next one doesn't even have a stop light or a store of any kind.  Now I am getting nervous.  We finally roll into Boulder Creek.  Couple of store fronts, one or two grocery stores and the local bar etc.  Almost all are closed down and it is dark.  As we come to the only three way stop in town panic begins to settle in.  "Oh no!  I have moved my family to hickville!!!  Mom, we are in the middle of no where," I whisper/shriek.  In my over exhausted state of mind that is what it looked like.  We go down the road a few more minutes and make it to the house.  The moving van is there and only 1/3 unloaded.  Though my stepdad and stepbrother left the night before they took a longer route and had only arrived an hour before us.  I began to cry uncontrollably and begged my mom to find Jesse and bring him to the car.  Our amazing church members were working to unload the truck and I could not keep it together.  After talking to Jesse my angel mother took me and Charlie back down the hill to a hotel for the night.  Finding a hotel Memorial Day weekend was an adventure in itself!  After a better night sleep (Quality Inn really has amazing beds) we came back the next day.  Things looked less bleak but still small town.  After a crazy two and half days of unpacking and recovery I said good bye to my parents and stepbrother.  Unpacking is still in progress but our house is slowly coming together.  The boys love their new school and so do I.  The town is small but I do have access to most things I need in under 20 minutes.  I have made some friends but have yet to find a pool to fulfill my aquatic needs:). All in good time.  Here are some pictures of our first few weeks.

Boxes make good seats

Checking out the view

Coolest bridge: photo op!!!

Our backyard

Santa Cruz

Some of our backyard finds

Boxes everywhere!

My way to cope...

Charlie is in charge of his wardrobe

Saturday adventure: this little place is actually in Santa Cruz.  It is a satellite exploration station for Monterey Bay.

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It has happened...

The phrase: "Why me and why now?" came to mind once or twice as I struggled through the last week and a half before and during our big move. Moving is no easy task.  Moving with three kids, no husband at home, and almost 9 months pregnant in hot, nasty weather is darn near impossible.  As I was moving things kept going wrong with the house.  First the a/c damaging the office floor.  Fixed it and replaced the floor.  Then, the water heater sprung a leak and damaged the office floor.  Replaced the water heater (ouch) and fixed the floor again.  Sent the husband out the door to get up to the new house and go to job orientation.  Then, termites.... REALLY?!?!?!  When I found out we had an unwanted party underneath our porch and how much it would cost to fix it all I sat down and had a good cry.  A looooong cry.  A headache producing cry.  Then, I went through what we needed to do to fix it.  I really didn't have time for the pity party to last so I gave the go ahead for the work and we agree to pay them out of escrow.  Isn't it amazing how things change?  The next day the exterminator brings over paperwork and tells me they can't be paid out of escrow.  Nice.  The day people are coming to load up the truck with our belongings I am scraping up money to pay for the house to be tented and repaired.  We had to pay out of pocket or the escrow could have fallen through or been rejected because of the discovery.  Ahhh, get everything into the truck already so I don't have to deal with this house any more!  

Friday afternoon we kicked things into high gear.  Thanks to an amazing friend who picked up the moving truck for me among other things, we were loading by 3:30 and finished by about 6:30.  I had many helpers and trying to coordinate this myself got to a point where we decided just get it all out of the house and into the carport area then the loading guys took it from there.  By 7:30 the floors were swept and the house was locked.  I eagerly headed to my moms where my boys were waiting.  Once arriving at Grammie's house all of us decided one last swim was in order.  The day had been so hot the water was barely cool enough to be refreshing but it felt great to get the weight off my feet and let the kids have fun.  I finally got the boys in bed by about ten and myself a little before midnight.  Knowing we had a long drive the next day it was an unwelcome surprise to have my two year old crawl into bed with me at 2:30 am.  At one point I got off of my edge of the double bed to slide him to the other side.  He promptly rolled towards the middle and kept snoozing away.  "Lovely!"  I thought as I made my way into the other room where my older boys were sleeping.  I attempted the roll to a side move with my oldest and slept on the full bed with him till the morning instead.  Remember this:  I am pregnant, stressed, and seriously sleep deprived at this point and we still have a 10 hour car ride ahead of us.  Yippee.

I made my way over to the house one last time to wipe down the kitchen, clear any last minute items, and give the floors a last once over.  Another friend helped me with that.  I really have some amazing friends and family!  You don't realize what dirty people you are until you move.  I vow to do better every time.  This time will be different!  Right... With everything done I locked the doors for the last time and took the last bag of trash to a neighbors trash can.  Ours were packed and I had been using all our neighbors trash cans to chuck stuff all week.  We had really nice neighbors or neighbors out of town.  Both were useful.  I looked at the house and just felt relief.  I was not sad to be leaving this money sucking leech.  I was only sad to see a place with memories be left behind.  I got back to my mom's and we hit the road around 10am.  The road trip will have to be another blog post folks.  I don't want to pack too much good stuff into one.

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Identification Please

It is interesting as we go through life we identify ourselves differently. 
        When we were in high school it was "I'm in ASB, I'm in band, I am a football, basketball, baseball player."  By identifying yourself you naturally fell in with a certain group of people.  If you were involved with many things you could move from one group to another and still have something in common with your peers. 
         When you move to college you identify yourself with your major.  The classes of majors are usually grouped close together.  You run into those people over and over again.  Same teachers. etc.  You have stuff to talk about because you all are going through the same thing.
       When you get married you start to identify yourself, in a woman's case, with a new last name.  This new last name and joining the ranks of the married folk can be difficult for young women.  Some older women do not know how to relate to the younger set.  What are they to talk about?  They all have kids.  What are you to talk about?  Many don't have an outside job.  Their kids are their job.  Talk about the men ladies.  Ya'll got one of those. 
       When you get pregnant you identify yourself by how far along you are.  People will open up and share horror stories with you if you are in your third trimester.  Watch out!  Then the child comes and you start to identify yourself by your child's age.  "Oh, I have a 13 month old and a 3 year old."
        As mothers, we naturally identify ourselves by our children.  I have gone through all these stages and found none of them to be surprising or weird.... until PTA.
        Oh, PTA is a different beast my friends and they identify themselves in a whole different way.  At the first PTA meeting we had to stand up and say our names, what committee we were on (I had yet to join one) and what grades our children were in/how many children we had.  Seriously, it is hard enough to keep track of how old my kids are now I have to announce their grade?  I sat there, waiting for my turn, rehearsing what I was going to say.  Oop!  I'm next: "Hi, I'm Rachel Wattson and I am not yet on a committee but I am here to help whoever needs it.  My children are in second grade and kindergarten."  I sit down.  Did you see my first fail?  I forgot to include that I had a third child!  Way to go me.  Anyway, it was over.  I wouldn't have to announce that again and if anyone remembered what I said and saw me with my 15 month old they could figure it out.  Fast forward a month later at the Book Fair I am helping with.  First off, I was not acknowledged by anyone in casual conversation.  Most likely because I did not have the chance to introduce myself when I got there.  The second day I came to help was not as crazy and during a lull I say "By the way, I'm Rachel." 
"Oh, hi, Sandy 5th."  In my head I am thinking excuse me?  Then I realize she is identifying herself by name and her student's grade.  Okayyyyy.  So I guess this is a regular thing then huh?

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One

He's one!  I have come to the conclusion that the more children I have the faster that first year flies past.  It feels like only yesterday that I was nursing him and praying for more than 4 hours of sleep.  So, here is to year number one my little Charlie man!  I love your smile, your laugh, and your budding personality.  Your sweet chubby feet and thighs make me smile.  I love how you walk around the house quacking like a duck and think it will get you out of trouble when you are suppose to be sleeping.  It usually does.  Happy birthday son:)!

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Oedipus Complex

Remember learning the greek tragedy in school?  About a king and a queen that have a baby.  An oracle or something tells that in the baby's future it will kill it's father and marry its mother.  So the king and queen do what any parent would do.  Send the baby out to die and to be sure it doesn't go anywhere they nail it's feet together at the ankles.  OUCH.  Long story short: baby found.  Grows up strong, happens to slay the king (his real dad) and marry the queen (his real mom).  I could tell the tragic part of the story, as if this first part isn't tragic enough, but the point is there is now a complex named after this greek character.
The Oedipus Complex is when a son is attracted to his mother.  Every boy goes through it.
 "I am going to marry mommy!"
"Mommy, you are the prettiest girl in the world!"
And so it goes.  Usually kids grow out of this around 6 or 7.  My son Ollie is still in it, pretty bad too.

We were playing the game life tonight and Ollie and I were a team.  The first thing Ollie says is "We are going to get MARRIED!"  He was super excited about it.  We got to the space and got hitched.  After which my 5 year old was as handsy as a horny first date.  He kept kissing me, hugging me, patting my back, and touching me in anyway he could the whole game.  At one point he laid his hand on my knee.  Hey there boy, gettin' fresh.  I must say, by the end of the game I was almost uncomfortable.  I kept telling him to cool it but he kept coming.  This makes me worry about his dating future.

I hope he learns to take no for an answer and he needs to learn that it's only a game not for realziez!  HAhaha!  I love my sweet affectionate boy but I am going to be on Frank's team next time.

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Flashback

I was driving in my car on the way home from errands today when I had a flashback.  I was thinking of when I worked at ColdStone Creamery right next to the Edwards Cinema in San Marcos.  You know, back in the year 2000 when it was a fun place.  People came in, created something great, and when they gave us a tip we sang.
One Saturday night I was working there with six other people, two of those were mormon.  Jeff Burns and Sean Chapman.  Cliff Barnum, a member of our church came up to Sean and said,"I'll give you five bucks if you sing "I am A Child of God.""
I am down the line helping another customer when I hear "TIP!"  That means we are about to sing.  Then I hear Sean start singing this primary song.  Jeff and I join in and we sing the whole first verse as the we continue to work.  The place was packed and here we were just singing away.  We finished the song and two minutes later another lady, one we didn't know, made her way up to the tip jar and put in a dollar "I want to hear that song again," she said.  Once again we sang.  I loved working at ColdStone.

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Engineer vs Imagineer

Frank is my literal, unimaginative child.  My sister took him to a playground once and said " Let's pretend the sand is lava!"  Frankie replys "but it's not lava.  It's sand."
"I know," says Heidi "but let's pretend. "
"But it's sand." Frank retorts.
Ollie, on the other hand, is extremely imaginative.  He is always showing me his "animals", making his stuffed animals come to life, and telling me stories.  Did you know Darth Mal is part rhino?  That is why he has horns. 
Last night, I played build a story with the boys.  We start with a character and setting then add a few sentences about what is going on.  I started then tossed the ball to Frank for his turn.  Jack, our character, was on the moon.  Frank says "and he flew home."  He passes the ball to Ollie.  Ollie says " he likes being home and plays with his toys."  Ball to me:  Jack decides he wants to fly again so he builds a rocket.  Ball to Frank:  and flies to outerspace.  Ball to Ollie: And he flies to Mars!  Then he meets an alien!  The alien says to watch out for the captain alien cuz he's mean but all the other aliens are nice.....
As you can see Ollie caught on pretty quick.  The next story we did poor Frank kept ending the story with his turn.  After a few revivals he gave up and didn't I know what to say.  Ollie kept giving his suggestions.  Seeing this happen last night I know Frank will need to exercise his imagination a bit.  I can see both boys as adults.  Ollie will think up crazy things to build and Frank will be able to use concrete materials to build them all.  Thus, my engineer and imagineer.

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Living in the moment

Sometimes, as a mother, I worry too much about maintaining my children instead of being with them.  I make sure laundry is clean,  dishes are done, chores are completed, homework is taken care of.  I drive them here, shop for groceries.  Drive them there, shop for groceries.  Pick them up, drop them off, shop for groceries.  Notice a pattern?
I decided awhile ago that I needed to be a little more in the moment with my kids so everyday I try to do something a little out of the ordinary, surprising, or just plain irresponsible.
Yesterday the boys and I listened and danced to Michael Jackson while setting the table.  We may or may not have continued to dance during dinner.
It's the little things like that I know my kids will remember most.  So,  go ahead.  Ignore the laundry and read your kids two or three books tonight at bed time.  Don't forget to do the voices:)

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Taking a leap!

I am not one to put myself out there when it comes to my art.  Singing, no problem.  For some reason when I am given a chance to submit a photography piece for something I bow out.  I do this alot!  I have displayed once and was frustrated with the fact that people did not understand what I was trying to communicate.  I did the bridal phrase "something old, something new, something borrowed, something blue." with four seperate images.  Though I felt it was obvious not as many people got it as I had hoped.  That isn't the issue though. The big issue is I fear rejection.  I fear people looking at it and saying, "meh, it's ok."  I don't mind my peers constructive criticism.  I mind the girl-next-door not liking it.  I don't know why this is.  You are never going to please everyone.
Well, no more.  I have submitted four art pieces to choose from and one or two might be selected to be show cases sometime in June at a local gallery.  What???  Here is what I sent in.

Sea Ranch Northern California: The North Shore

La Jolla Shores: Alone but not Lonely

San Diego Zoo Hippo Exhibit: Coming up for Air

Kellogg Park: Free

 Even if I don't have a shot in Hades I tried.

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I can do that

That is the phrase I use all too often when I see something cute to buy.  I look at it, mull over the components and the skill used to make it and think "I can do that."  Consequently, I do not buy the item and I continue to think about making one.  Sometimes I even go as far as buying the materials for making something and then it just sits there.  I need to join "projects anaynomous".  You know, a group of us would sit around and applaud each other for actually buying something than trying to make it.  I can see it now.
A room full of women and some DIY home improvement guys too.  Sitting in a circle.  Barbara stands.
"I saw these cute curtains in Target today.  Instead of going online to find similar fabric to purchase and sew, only to have it arrive and have no drive to actually complete the project I BOUGHT the curtains."
(Polite applause)
"The best part was, I found a 15% off coupon on my smart phone while I was standing in line for check out!"
(more enthusiastic applause)
"Thank you!  It's been a long road.  It has now been 2 weeks since my last unfinished project.  I feel good."
Now that you have gotten a peek inside my mind allow me to explain.  I love making things, I do!  I love taking on a project and creating a finished project out of raw materials.  I am also coming to realize that with three kids, one of them being a baby under a year, I just don't have time right now.  So, I will put my creative hat on the shelf for a while, avoid pintrest like the plague, and feel good about buying things that I don't have time to make.

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Real Canadians

Oliver is my boy with an imagination.  He loves telling stories and playing pretend.  One night he was running around the house in his pjs with a rubber band around his head like a sweat band.  Then he added a cape to this costume.  "I am Oliven the Strong," he proclaimed.
"Oh, hello, Oliven." I replied.
"I am a strong Canadian," he continued.  "Strong canadians wear king rubbers like these." He said as he pointed to the rubber band cutting off the circulation around his forehead.  Oh this kid cracks me up!

Thursday night of last week we had the sister missionaries over for dinner.  Both were new to our ward so we asked the usual questions like: "where are you from, how many brothers and sisters, etc."
One of the sisters happened to be from Canada.
"Ollie," I said "she's a Canadian."
Ollie looked at her unimpressed.  He said"Oh." and nothing more.  Apparently, she was not what Canadians were suppose to look like.  I think he was expecting more of a viking type?

Maybe if the sister had come over dressed like this?------------------>
Then again, maybe not.

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Entertain me!

Does anyone else get on their blog and start trolling other peoples blogs looking for something to entertain?  I find myself getting on my blog, which I haven't written on in weeks, going down my list of blogs I follow and looking for something to read.  I almost get annoyed when there is nothing new there.  Curses!  Everyone else has been too busy to write something for my enjoyment.  It doesn't take that long... really.
How funny is it that I depend on others to dish about what is going on in their world when I haven't been writing about mine?  This doesn't mean I am going to change.  Making promises I can't keep is a habit I am trying to break.  I can't promise that I will faithfully write everyday, or even every week.  I can't guarantee that I will document important stages or moments in my children's lives.  I make no promises!  Ha!  It feels amazing to have no accountability.  What I can say is this: taking time to sit down and read what you have to say and show is enjoyable so in the future I will attempt to reciprocate with something enjoyable as well on no regular basis.

Quick family update for you: In January, Frank broke his arm, Ollie got road rash on his face, and Charlie is starting to sleep through the night.  Jesse is in the fire academy and I am trying to keep up with 4 hungry males in the house while getting my photography business rolling again.  Now go take on the day.

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Proper Etiquette

This has been a question I have been mulling around for a while and I figure I might as well throw it out there.  In today's world of social networking, constantly being updated on what is going on in others lives how do you go about face to face interaction?  This may seem like a weird question but allow me to give an example or two.
          I was recently at a wedding of a childhood friend.  While there, I met up with many people I hadn't seen (in person) for years but I had seen via facebook just yesterday.  I kind of picked up like we had just talked a week ago and dove into a conversation about how their son was doing etc.  Is that rude?  Do I still have to do the whole: "Oh my gosh, I haven't seen you in like forever!  Please update me on the last eight years!" shpeel?  I would rather give them a hug and say "Hi, nice to see you in person... how did that thing turn out with your daughter?"  Is that wrong?
         Another example of cyber closeness turning into possibly awkward moment.  When I was at the temple I saw a friend of mine and his wife.  His wife, I had never physically met but I have read her blog and commented several times.  I would say we are cyber pals so I didn't feel weird making eye contact and waving hi.  I went over to them and being the person that I am I gave her a hug hello as well as him and chatted a while.  Now, with her in particular, I felt that I could do that but I thought later..."what is appropriate when cyber friends meet?  Is it like a weird first date kind of thing where you don't know wether to shake hands, high five, or hug?  Or, is it a case by case basis?  Hmmm.  What are your thoughts?  BTW, Sheena if you read this: we are totally friends for real now;)

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Christmas is...

Christmas is different for me every year.  Some years are really great and I am into the Christmas spirit and then other years I am scroogy and depressed because I miss my Dad.  This year is one of "those" years.  With so many changes happening in my life this year it reminds me what my dad is missing and how much I miss sharing my life with him.  Life goes on,  and I am not sad ALL the time but there are moments throughout the day that bring into sharp focus he's not here.  I warned Jesse this year was not a good one for me.  I thank the Lord everyday for an understanding husband.  HE took the kids to get our tree.  One that I reluctantly paid for out of our dinky Christmas budget.  HE fielded the kids when I got snippy about decorating the house and HE has been finding little extra things like a video email from Santa to make Christmas a little more magical.  I sit on the sidelines, trying not to be grumpy, and apologizing when I loose it.  I have come to accept that Christmases will be this way some years.  These are the years I have to dig deep, serve others, and forget myself and my petty problems.  I am blessed and grateful for what I have.  So, Dad, I hope you peek in on us this Christmas.  I miss you.

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